


Halloween means Tiny Shorts, Right?

by TheAngryWeasel



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-11
Updated: 2015-08-11
Packaged: 2018-04-14 05:08:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4551726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAngryWeasel/pseuds/TheAngryWeasel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave convinces John to wear a skimpy outfit and things go how you might expect.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Halloween means Tiny Shorts, Right?

Halloween had to be one of your favorite times of the year, next to April Fools. It was one of the only times of the year where it was socially acceptable to play pranks and scare people as much as he wanted, and you loved it. You'd already played pranks on all your friends, and now it was time for Jade's annual Halloween bash. You weren't sure what you wanted to be until recently, when Dave made a suggestion.

This year, you were going to dress up as a demon; it was perfect for you, really. Though the costume that Dave supplied you with was… a bit revealing for you. It had shorts that could easily pass for red leather underwear, thigh high red boots, a tiny vest that really didn't cover anything, and little clip in red horns. It also came with little fangs and a small pitchfork as well. It was incredibly cliché, but hey. Why not? You were sure to freak a few people out with it, and you were all for freaking people out! Though, now Dave was teasing you, of course.

"So, Egbert. Can't say I expected you to go through with this, honestly. You tryin' to get laid or something?" Dave raised his eyebrow at you, smirking. You just roll your eyes, zipping up the boots.

"Oh shut up! You know I'd much rather play pranks and the shit out of people than waste my time getting laid. I can get laid some other time." You look in the mirror, and jeez, were the shorts really that short? Yeah, you were gonna get some interesting comments.

"You never know, man. Someone could catch your eye." You huff.

"Y'know, if you keep this up, I’m taking this off and putting on my ghost busters stuff I wear every other yeah, I don't care about my stupid promise from last year!" Dave sighs and gives you a look.

"Fine, fine. But you might wanna keep this with you." He slides something in your pocket, and you give him a playful shove.

"If that turns out to be a condom and it falls out of my pocket I'm gonna kill you. Now c'mon, we're gonna be late you ass!" You grin with excitement; Jade's parties were the best. You rush to the car, hoping in the passenger seat to see a very bemused Rose in the driver's seat dressed in wizard's garb. Your face gets a little hot.

"Don't say anything, it was this or ghost busters again, and I promised you guys I'd do something new this year." Rose laughs softly.

"I have to say, I'm surprised. I wasn't even sure you'd go through with your promise." She pulls out of the driveway as Dave jumps into the back seat in some dumb cosplay. What a nerd. You're briefly reminded that he put something in your pocket before you ran off, and you should probably check that out, though you couldn't do that while you were sitting down. Damn. You couldn't be pulling it out of your pocket at the party either in case it was a condom. Ugh. It doesn't take you long to get to the party, and you jump out of the car, impatient as you wait for your friends to catch with you, then ringing the doorbell several times. Soon enough, Jade answers the door in Hufflepuff robes. Wow, she really went all out this year, huh? On the other hand, she snorted when she saw you, and you feel yourself blush again. Not again.

"John, what are you wearing?" You pout, and glare at Dave.

"Shut up! I'm just keeping my promise, and Dave said I should be a demon, but I didn't realize that he meant this." You gesture to yourself, sighing. "But I don't have anything else but the ghost busters stuff, so… whorish demon it is." You laugh a bit, trying to make a sort of joke out of this whole mess. Jade laughs with you, stepping aside and letting you all in. There are already plenty of people around, most with drinks in their hands. The party wasn't in full swing just yet, though; in the next half hour, at least another thirty or more people would get here, and things would start getting interesting.

For now, you move to the punch bowl, getting yourself some of the pumpkin flavored stuff. Hell yeah. You take a sip and sigh. That was some good stuff. You turn around to look over the party, scanning the crowd for any familiar faces. You laugh at some of the costumes you see; it looks like someone got Sollux into a silly bee costume. That was hilarious. You look around a bit more before you hear it.

"Egbert, what the everloving FUCK are you wearing?!" You turn to face the one and only Karkat Vantas, who's dressed as some sort of… angel? Yep, there's the harp. Nice. You shrug.

"Dave insisted I keep my promise. Didn't realize this was what he meant." You were getting really tired of all of this reexplaining yourself a million times. Why couldn't you just wear something weird without questions? This was Halloween, for fuck's sake.

"I'm just concerned because if I hang out with a soused up fucker like you, people are gonna start thinking we planned matching outfits. And I am NOT going to be lumped together with some shitstain like you." You roll your eyes and grin, throwing an arm around his shoulders.

"Aw, c'mon Karkat! Don't deny you wanna be set up with a hottie like me." You lean close to him, waggling your eyebrows, and laughing as he shoves you off of him a disgusted expression.

"Gross! I can't believe you'd ever even suggest something like that, eugh." Karkat stormed off while you chuckled to yourself, taking another drink of the punch. You wonder who you'll run into next; you tend to meet up with most of your friends here every year. Maybe you'd go looking for Roxy or Jake or something if you didn't see anyone else you knew. You could see that Dave was already talking to some dude in skimpier clothes than you, and Rose and Jade were talking with Kanaya and Porrim. Nice. You walk around a while, drinking your punch and looking at all the costumes. There were some pretty cool ones this year; steampunk stuff, a period accurate pirate, a really hot Harley Quinn, and a werewolf with surprisingly good make up. There were of course the dumb costumes too, and a few people who didn't wear any costume (what the fuck, it was a costume party). Either way, it looked like things were really picking up now. Eventually, you circle back to the entrance, walking back into the party, but glancing over as Jade opens the door for a few more guests. And holy fuck are you glad that you do.

Stepping into the house were two people, who appeared a girl and boy(though you never know). The girl was dressed up very nicely, with a shell crown on and long flowing ginger locks. She was evidently some sort of mermaid or something, with all the scales painted on her and shells adorning her outfit. The boy beside her(who you hoped to god wasn't her boyfriend) was dressed as a sexy police officer, with shorts to rival your own. He even had a pair of fluffy hand cuffs strapped to his belt, and a fake gun. He was ginger as well, but his bangs were styled back and dyed purple. In other words, he was hot as hell, and boy you were glad you'd gotten over all of your sexuality issues when you started college, because it would be a crying shame not to at least appreciate this.

You quickly look away before you get caught staring at the red headed hottie, allowing yourself one glance back to see him walking towards Sollux, and damn, his ass was better than yours. Maybe Dave was right about tonight. But if you did pursue him, it would be later; you still had stuff to do, like meet up with people and pull pranks.

And that was what you did, too. You spend at least a good half hour putting ice down various people's costumes before Jade makes you stop, and wait around corners and under the tables to scare the other party goers. Eventually you calm down a little, at least enough to catch up with Jake and Roxy. You say hi to Nepeta as well, and talk with a few others you didn't know before this and likely wouldn't talk to again. Still, it was all lots of fun and you were certainly enjoying yourself. The later it got, though, the more wild people started getting. Someone had brought orange jello shots in the shape of pumpkins, and others brought out little purple drinks that appeared to be smoking. Apparently it was dry ice, so you warned your friends to be careful not to swallow the ice portion.

You stayed away from most of the alcohol, not wanting to go to fast and end up throwing up or passing out too early. Though, it looked like the police officer guy had some kind of alcohol in his little gun, and was shooting it into people's mouths when they asked. Damn. Karkat must have seen you staring, because he came over and huffed at you.

"Really? Of all people?" He raised his eyebrows at you, and you held yours hands up.

"What? Do you know him or something?"Karkat grimaced.

"Unfortunately yes. That's Eridan Ampora, prince of douche city." Wait this was the guy that Karkat had told him about? Wow. That meant he also had a Scottish accent. Hnng. Why did assholes have to be so hot? It really wasn't fair at all.

So you ignore the almost sinfully attractive douchebag and talk to Jake and Roxy for a little while, and do one of the jello shots, which are surprisingly good. The ones he'd had before were not very good at all. You play a few more pranks, avoiding Jade so she couldn't tell you off for doing it. You empty your hand of ice into the back of someone's shirt, very surprised when the person who turned around was no other than one Eridan Ampora. Whoops.

"Wwhat the fuck wwas that for?!" You grin as you get an idea. Oh, this would be perfect.

"You're asking a demon why he did something to you? Seriously? I thought that it would be expected." You could see him blink and trail his eyes down your body and back up to your face, then smirk. You never thought you would be glad that you wore something like this, but now you were; he certainly wouldn't be looking at you like this if you were wearing that. Fuck yes.

"Guess you're right about that… I oughta teach ya a little lesson with my gun though, shouldn't I?" He pulls it from his belt with a raised eyebrow, and you lick your lips.

"I think you might have to." You smirk back at him, stepping a bit closer to him. He wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you in close. You rest your hand on his shoulder, very glad that you'd accidently dumped that ice down his back.

"Open up." He orders, and gladly comply, swallowing as he aimed the fake pistol at your mouth and shot whatever was in it onto your tongue. It was strong, and left a burn in your throat as you swallowed the last few drops down. Yeah, you really didn't give a shit if he was the biggest asshole in the world, he was hot and the way he was looking at you made your knees go weak. Weaker than you thought evidently, because Eridan was pulling closer with a soft laugh.

"Are you swooning for you now? How scandalous, a demon falling all over a human." You grin at him.

"Guess I'm just out of control then, officer." You watch as Eridan gives an almost predatory grin and you swallow; fuck, that was hot.

"Oh? Do I have to I have to get you under control now? Really, you're much too dangerous to be out in public, I should take you to another room and make sure you can't hurt anyone." Holy shit, was he suggesting… Well. You said you wouldn't, but this opportunity was not one that he was going to pass up. He was really starting to hope that Dave had stuck a condom in his pocket.

"Maybe you should. But I can be pretty wild, you might have to restrain me." You lick your lips, pressing against him. You were getting laid tonight, and it was going to be great. "Oh? Well, it's a good thing I come prepared." His hand drifts down to your ass, giving it a squeeze, causing you to press against him harder and bite your lip. Eridan seems to enjoy this very much, given the way that he presses back and licks his lips.

"Mmhm… you wanna lead the way then, officer?" He nods slightly, leading you up the stairs by his hand on your ass. You're just about ready to jump him here in hall when you see something you didn't expect in the least; Dave already had none other than Karkat up against the wall, who sputtered when he saw you and pushed Dave off of him.

"H-holy fucking shit Egbert, what the hell? You're fucking with me, please tell me that you're just fucking with me." Dave is just grinning his face off, looking smug as fuck. Damn him. Eridan however, pulled you closer and sneered a bit at Karkat.

"Nope. Not even a little bit, Kar." You gasp softly as he leans down and kisses at your neck, giving you a little nip. You were a bit embarrassed that he was doing this in front of people that you knew, and were friends with, but there wasn't much you could do now.

"Fine, if you wanna fuck the biggest asshole in the universe be my guest!" Karkat then grabbed Dave's hand and walked back down stairs, leaving Eridan alone with you, giving you both the freedom to forget about what had just happened, and fall into an empty room, pushing the door closed only as an after thought as their lips all but crashed together, and you felt your back hit a wall and Eridan nearly crushed you against it, pressing his leg between yours. You moaned into his mouth, wrapping your arms around his neck as he tangled his tongue with yours, pulling your hair back and making you gasp at the pull. Your 'officer' leaned down to kiss and bite down your neck and chest, leaving you breathless under his mouth. You thread your fingers through his hair, pulling slightly. He growled, which surprised you enough, if the harsh bite didn't do it.

"Don't fuck wwith my hair, got it?" Shit, he could really be scary when he wanted. You nodded, biting your lip to hold back a moan when he grinds his leg into your dick.

"Say it, out loud. Now." Man, he was demanding. It was a good thing that you were into that.

"Y-yeah, yeah I got it." You breath out, gasping and spreading your legs more when he pushed his leg on you more.

"Sir." He told you, even more forcefully, making you whimper with pleasure under him as he presses his leg harder into your arousal.

"Sir! I-I've got it, sir." He grins wolfishly down at you, and you shiver. Sure, you hadn't expected him to be so… insistent, but you couldn't deny that you were very turned on by his attitude. What? You like being ordered around in the bedroom, you were allowed to like things. Though if Dave ever found out he'd never let you hear the end of it, you were sure. Eridan seems to be very into your response, from his reaction. He goes back to kissing down your neck and chest, sucking on one of your nipples. Christ, that was good. You put your hand on his shoulders this time, groaning at the feeling of his mouth on you. Yeah, tonight was going to be great, no doubt about it.

Suddenly the next thing you know is that Eridan is pushing you to your knees and unbuckling his belt. Oh. Well, if that was how he was going to play it. You smirk up at him as he unzips his pants, rubbing at him through his briefs with your hand, pulling him out with your other hand and stroking him slowly, looking up at his face as you lean forward to lick him from base to tip. He lets out a soft groan, threading his fingers in your hair, just resting there for the moment, though you were fairly certain that he had no issues what so ever with yanking the shit out if it happened to suit his fancy.

You slid your lips over the head, sucking gently as you tongued his slit, hearing his breath catch as you did so, his hand tighten in your hair and pressing down slightly. You did sink down another half inch or so, taking your time and pushing your ass out just a little. Why not, after all? It'd just make him more desperate to really feel you anyways, so you didn't see a problem with playing it up a little bit.

You lapped at him as you worked yourself farther down on him, bobbing your head slightly. Eridan wasn't especially big or anything, but you didn't exactly have a big mouth either, so you couldn't take him all in, though you got pretty close(and to be honest, you didn't really wanna get fucked by someone over average. There was a reason average was were it was; anything much bigger tended to hurt. A lot.). And from the looks of it, Eridan was loving it from the was he was pushing and pulling your hair to guide you to what felt best. He didn't force to go any farther than you were able, or even try to once he realized your limit, which was surprisingly considerate of him, considering your experience with him so far.

It wasn't too long before he's pulling you off of him and yanking you to your feet and into a searing kiss, leaving you to grasp at his shirt for purchase before you fell. When he pulls back, you're still panting for breath, and he leans into whisper something in your ear about punishing you for mussing his hair earlier that you're too busy trying to breathe to listen to properly. Of course, because of this you're caught unawares when he shoves you face first on the bed, bent at the waist. You were about to move onto the bed when you feel his hand on your ass, giving a little squeeze here and there.

"Oh, I think I like the way you look like this… But there's just one issue, you see; you're wearing a bit too much clothing for my taste." He handcuffs your wrists before you can do anything yourself, then reaches around you to unclasp your shorts and pull them down with your briefs. You hear him chuckle softly as he pulls them all the way off, then feel his hand on your ass again. "Yes, this is so much better. But still… there's still one thing missing. Let's see if wwe can fix that, hm?" His hand disappears for a second, only to come back down with a sting and a slap, causing you to gasp and moan, pushing back into his hand after intially flinching away. You hear him laugh, rubbing the spot he struck. "Oh? Do you like that?" He smacks you twice more before squeezing that cheek hard, drawing a whimper from your lips. He laughs again and continues, spanking you until you're sure that sitting tomorrow will be at least a bit of a challenge.

By the time he finally stops (though you aren't complaining), you're breathless and a shivery mess. He rubbed at the sore, reddened skin and you whined, gasping when you felt a generously lubed finger prod against your entrance. You press back against him and moan loudly as he presses it inside. When had he had time to do that?

Whatever, it felt amazing. You arch into his touch and let him do as he pleased, shaking under the pleasure. You feel him lean over you, and his breath against your ear.

"You like that?" He nibbles at your ear as he shoves his second finger in, making you cry out softly.

"Yes! F-fuck, yes sir, I love it." You moan as he presses into your prostrate, smacking your ass again. You spread your legs for him as he spreads you further, gasping and groaning as he touched you and got you ready for the main act, which was pressing rather insistantly against you. You whine when he pulls his fingers out of you, wanting the friction back. Your complaint dies on your lips as he flips you over, quickly lining himself up again.

"You ready for me?" He presses in just slightly and you arch into him, nodding.

"Give it to me, please sir, I need it…" You beg, groaning as he pushed in a few inches. This was exactly what you wanted right now, and you were prepared to beg much more for it. Though, it doesn't look like you'll have to, since he takes the chance to seat himself in you completely. Had you had use of your hands, you'd be scratching the hell of his back. But for now you could just look up at him and take what he gave you, which you had no problem with. One thing you didn't expect, however, was him pulling out his little pistol again. "Open up, baby. You know you want it." You do as you're told; he's right after all. You open your mouth and swallow what he gives you, arching your back as he starts to move, rolling his hips in and out of you. You whine and gasp for breath, trembling hard underneath him. You squeeze your eyes shut, whimpering under the pleasure. You only get even louder as takes your dick in his hand starts to stroke you as he speeds up the pace of his thrusts.

You don't expect the little gun to be pressed against your lips, filling your mouth with liquid again. You swallow, opening your eyes to look up at him, and holy shit, the way he's looking at you is hot as shit. From the way he's pressing the gun against you lips still, you're pretty sure that he's getting off on it, so you take the tip of the gun between your lips and suck gently, very satisfied with yourself when you hear him swear under his breath and thrust into you harder. He pulls the little trigger and your mouth fills with liquid again, which you quickly swallow, though a bit escapes your mouth and drips down your cheek. Eridan seems eager to lick it up, kissing you hard and shoving his tongue into your mouth. He really liked putting shit in your mouth, didn't he? That was fine with you, and you were happy to tangle your tongue with his, gasping when he brushed against your prostate. You weren't going to last very long, not with how he was touching you so much.

"E-eridan, sir, please, I can't…" You cry out as he bites your shoulder, his voice strained against your ear.

"That's it, come on now, come for me baby…" He strokes you faster, and you swear that you're screaming as you give into pleasure, coming white ropes onto his hand and your stomach. He keeps fucking you right through your orgasm, and you whimper, going limp in the afterglow. He grunts and stops moving, panting and falling to sit beside you on the bed. He takes a few breaths and takes off and tosses the condom before seeming to realize that your hands were still bound.

"Shit, sorry about that, here let me help with that…" He stands and lifts you up slightly, unlocking the cuffs and setting them aside. "Are you feelin' alright? I hope that I wwasn't too rough on you." You laugh softly, falling back on the bed again and dragging him with you.

"Mm, it was great. Now I'm big on post sex cuddles, and because of your little gun I'm pretty drunk now so you get stay here with me for a while." You wrap your arms around him, burying your face in his shirt. You hear him chuckle and he wraps his arms around you, much to your pleasure. That was nice.

"So, you know Kar?" You nod a little.

"Evidently you do too. Care to share why he thinks you're the biggest asshole in the world?" You're curious, honestly, and you may not get another chance to ask.

"Eh, we were friends, I fucked up. Doesn't help that I tend to be kinda blunt with stuff. I'm not good at being nice." You nod again, sighing softly.

"Well you seem pretty cool to me. We should hang out sometime." You yawn, closing your eyes and giving him a squeeze.

"Yeah? Wwe can talk about that in the morning, wwhen you aren't drunk." You laugh softly, already falling asleep.

"Yeah, I like that idea…" You let yourself drift off to sleep, happy with how this Halloween turned out.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! This'll probably be a one shot as long as I don't have any reason to make it longer. But if you have any ideas, feel free to comment.


End file.
